Salvation is at hand. You may now repent without recrimination. I am giving you this opportunity. This is your get out of jail free card. Literally. Use it. Purge yourself. Yes, purge yourself.

I am declaring a Cables Amnesty.

You may now go to the garage. You may enter the garage. (Or the attic. Or wherever it is you are storing them).

And you may take that box of cables. That box of mangled tangled cables. And you may rid yourself of these cables forever.

I urge you to repent. Think about it. Open the lid cautiously and sneak your hand in. Grab the hair ball of cables and hold it aloft.

What you see is a hideous hairball of plastic and metal. We’re talking scart plugs, we’re talking kettle leads, old phone chargers, old camera power leads, telephone extensions, tv aerial wires, adapters for routers, adaptors for memory discs, converters to USB to mini jack, mini jack to maxi jack and back and God only knows what else.

The one thing that binds all this mess of useless cabling together, the one common factor in all this atrocious spaghetti of redundant plastic is this.

It’s that little voice that says to you as you look at them.

“That might come in handy one day”

But deep down my friends , you know in your soul, deep down in the very marrow of your bones you know that you will never ever, ever, ever, use them.

So we have declared a Cables Amnesty. Either bring your box of cables to the Arts Centre in time for The Farmers Market on Friday 2nd November or call us and the Cables Amnesty team - Darius Laws and myself (it’s all his fault really) and we will collect your cables on Sunday afternoon 28th October.

Leave that box on the porch and it will disappear forever.

We are working with Enform the environmental agency and Colchester Borough Council recycling team to ensure their responsible disposal.

There will of course be prizes. Sexiest cable, rarest cable, oldest cable etc - and you are most welcome to come and take whatever cables are useful to you home. All free.

However, I must counsel caution. These cables are an invasive species. As soon as you return home fresh from cable cleansing check your garage. It’s not unlikely a small shoe box of useless cables may will have formed in your absence.

The Cables Amnesty

Colchester Farmers Market

Friday 2nd November 9 am – 1pm

For collection call Cables Amnesty Hotline 07814 695598